33 Months

Happy Mother's Day. I remember my first mother's day. It was extremely hard. I was still a Mom but to many they couldn't see that. They don't see angels and neither do I. But I know Lola is with us. I think she is Milo's guardian angel.I think she is always saying to him, "just smile" and he does. He radiates pure joy. Last year we planted this simple pink rose bush in our backyard, it is adorned with a small angel plaque. On Saturday, the first two pink blooms were ready to be cut and displayed. As I walked down the stairs, there they were sitting on the counter with the sun shining in on them,a little sparkly glass vase.(thanks to my wonderful husband) How could you not smile. So do I beleive Lola is with us... Always. She sent me my mother's day flowers...2 pink roses from her bush. You can call me crazy but how do those things just happen...I will always look for signs. I am still learning and growing as mom on earth and mom to an angel. It's a strange balance. There is so much happiness and yet there is always a little "sting" in the day. Something that jabs at you, reminds you things are far from perfect...just like the thorn of a rose. So beautiful, but touch the rose in the wrong spot and a little- owie as milo calls it may appear. I am not sure I will ever be able to comprehend the thorn. I just will never understand. But somehow we learn to make peace with our lives and view the beauty in people and the moments we share with them. I guess we need to take time and SMELL THE ROSES. So happy mother's day to all the moms out there- I hope the next time you see a pink rose you will think of little Lola. Smile.